Leo Straub's Admonishments of Doom

Thursday, November 18, 2004

An Ode to Pittsburgh

Pittsburgh! The Iron City. I refer to it as home. But, some people refer to it as the armpit of America. A certain rich man’s magazine rated this city the lowest on their charts. Their main reasoning was that we were a city filled with mullet heads and that our night life sucked. Though I agree that Pittsburgh could be a better city. They obviously did not take a good look at the place. What we lack in quantity we make up for in quality. This city is small but it’s vibrant.

OK granted, we have yokels who use words like "Yinz", "Gum Band", and "Dahntahn". Granted, Downtown Pittsburgh closes at six o’clock besides the "Smithfield News" and Porn Shops. and yes, there is construction beyond necessary requirements.

However, during the day the place is crawling with all sorts of happy go lucky stuff such as music at Market Square, Art Festivals, Shopping frenzies at the strip district, and boat rides on one of our three rivers. But, if it’s night life you really want, don’t focus on Downtown Pittsburgh. On the outskirts of the city we’ve got posh nightclubs, a good theater community, comedy clubs, and a dinner & movie themed waterfront. And if none of that tickles your fancy you can always bar-hop in southside where you can drink and drink and drink and drink and drink until you forget you're even IN Pittsburgh!

Monday, November 08, 2004

Dipping My Toe in the Cesspool

So, this is a 'blog,' the last bastion of free speech on this godforesaken planet. Well, so be it...

In an equilibrium where MTV is has been replaced by -- what, MySpace? Purevolume? Ani DiFuckingFranco? -- and a music video is now just a commercial (often followed by an actual commercial containing THE EXACT SAME SONG), "Music Television" has relegated itself to the chore [no, the MISSION] of taking reality TV to the next level. And, frankly...... whatever level that is..... it's there already. (*see: "Pimp My Ride," et al.)

But I digress. If this is the last underground expression of thought in a world lit by magpies with Lance Armstrong day-glo bracelets around their necks, then you fuckers better get ready for some hot, steaming truth, served up Leo style. After all, life is short, and we free thinkers have to stick together...

"I guess this is what it sounds like..... When Doves Cry" - Phil Collins